Sunday, April 15, 2012

Attempting Sex: Preparing for Intercourse After Vestibulectomy

Just another update. I encourage everyone to read my comment on the last post about addressing pain with physical therapy. So far it has really improved things along with recovering form surgery. I am excited to say that I had sex for the first time yesterday (since surgery) and it went really well. Still some pain with entry and a slight burning at times - but overall very good. I could really tell that my muscles were more relaxed. The area that I had removed with surgery was pain free! I just have some more internal burning that it getting better with PT. I am still going 2x a week and I am now using a size large dilator. The dilator hurts upon insertion but once it's in I feel nothing but mild stretching. Any friction with the dilator is somewhat painful though. I decided to get a size large so that I could be comfortable with something as large or maybe even a little larger than my boyfriend to make him seem smaller.

 I used a 3% lidocaine jelly that I had my pharmacist compound for me because the one that was originally prescribed for me was causing burning. I guess it was a combination of a high percentage (5%) and the base of the lidocaine cream that was causing the burning. I put about a dab about 2x the size of a pea just inside the opening (maybe 1-2 inches inside) from the 2pm to 11pm area. Then I use my figures to gently stretch open the area before intercourse. I wait about 5 minutes and I'm good to go. Make sure to use extra lube! I've found the lidocaine jelly actually works to let things slide easier. I also recommend "surgilube" which is a gentle option that my physical therapist uses. 

Comment and share your questions or experiences!


  1. Could you tell me the name of the type of physical therapy you are doing.

  2. and if it is covered by medical insurance? And if it is not do you mind saying what the cost would be

  3. I'm glad I found your blog. I had this surgery in October. I have been to physical therapy but haven't yet tried intercourse because dilators still really hurt. When using dilators, did you feel burning pain when you would go to the next size up?

    Lara - my physical therapy was covered by my insurance (pelvic floor physical therapy). As for cost, it would depend on your insurance. I paid $25 per visit.

  4. Just wanted to know if things are still going well and positive after the surgery and physical therapy

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  6. It's been awhile since your last post. How are you doing now? I had my surgery on June 11. Just started PT 4 weeks ago. Last week was the first time she "massaged" the muscles just inside that are still causing me burning. I'm also using dialators but only up to the second size. Saw my doctor on Tuesday and she wants me to wait another 8 weeks before having sex. So sometime in October. Very nervous that the surgery didn't work. Thankful that my husband of 25 years has been so supportive through the last 16 years of my pain.

    Any updates would be helpful! Thanks!